“You need to write, Elsa. This is your gift. You even type quickly. You are relatable. You need to write.”
God told me, so I guess I gotta do it.
I love to write. I love to encourage people. I think of analogies to simple life situations and make them deeply spiritual all the time. I’ve always done this. Sometimes I even annoy myself with it, finding meaning in everything, but it’s just the way I am.
I overthink, I talk too much and I doubt myself at times. But I have a deep empathy for people going through hard things, I can literally talk to anyone (like I know people say this, but like, really, I talk to everyone), and I know that there’s something I’ll write about that someone needs to hear.
Today’s post will share some stories about a man who taught me about long line fishing on a Greyhound bus from Louisville, Kentucky to Nashville, Tennessee. His name was Pappy.
I’m gonna have a good list of things to tell my grand-kids, but I figured I should start writing them down now. I’ve always said that things that happen to me don’t happen to normal people, and I think it’s true. I see God everywhere.
Even the other day, I learned the word “kairos” and then I saw it come up again and it meant so much to me. It wouldn’t have meant anything to me if I hadn’t learned what it meant just a few weeks prior. That ever happen to you? You’re just like, “okay, God, I see you, I see you.”
“At an appointed time.” That’s what the Greek work kairos means. The appointed time in the purpose of God.
I believe everything, I mean everything, happens for a reason. We may not always know the reason, and the reason might not always be good, because sometimes things happen that we can’t explain. Like something I found out on that Greyhound bus about Pappy. But meaning comes from everything.
Pappy shared with me that lost his daughter to cancer when she was 8. Eight. I have tears in my eyes just typing that.
Why the hell does stuff like that happen? Sometimes I wonder if we will ever know the answer to that question this side of heaven.
I then realized, while sitting next to Pappy, that I was the same age that she would have been the day I sat next to him on that Greyhound bus. Which by the way, I thought was going to be a train. (I bought an Amtrak train ticket from Indianapolis, IN to Nashville, TN just to find out it was actually going to be a Greyhound Bus. Story of my life).
But really, why did that happen? Why did Pappy’s daughter have to die? Why was Pappy my seatmate? Why did we spend 2 hours of the trip talking? And why did that mean so much to me to realize that I was the same age as the daughter he lost?
Because I knew that it was an appointed time. It was a kairos moment.
I could have spent the trip on my phone or trying to sleep, but I knew I was supposed to talk to this man, hear his stories and learn about long line fishing (which by the way, I knew NOTHING about until he started explaining it to me. Never would have learned about what terrors tuna fish could be if it wasn’t for Pappy.)
I just knew he needed someone to talk to. Someone to ask him questions. Someone to actually care. Someone to listen. He was such a sweet man. I still tear up thinking about Pappy. Who knows if he will ever remember me, but I will never forget him.
I knew that God wanted to tell me some things through that encounter. He wanted me to see him. He wanted me to learn something new, but also meet someone I probably wouldn’t have met any other way. (Not gonna lie, traveling alone at night on a Greyhound bus was not what I had originally signed up for).
I’ll probably never see Pappy again. But the memory of our bus ride together will stick with me for life. I was exactly where I was supposed to be and God showed himself to me. God reminded me of how precious life is and we never know what’s going to come next, but God also works everything out in crazy ways.
You want to know what else I learned about Pappy on that bus ride? Not only was he a fisherman for 18+ years (I think he said he had spent like 2-3 years of his LIFE on a boat), but that when he was 24, he was in a horrible accident in an elevator.
A cable broke and the elevator fell. With five people in the elevator, and horrible injuries to everyone involved, Pappy broke his back. He was 24. Can you imagine breaking your back at 24 years old? And you want to know what this lead to? Becoming one of the best dart players in the state of Florida. Like what?!
It’s true. He told me when he was in a full back cast, it was really uncomfortable to sit down, so for 4+ months, every day, he would play darts to pass the time. He got so good at playing darts that he was scouted and hired by Anheuser-Busch to compete around the country. With nice silk lined jackets with his name printed on them and everything. And he said he made really good money and always got free beer. Again, what?!?!
Why am I writing this all down now? Why am I so invested in this man’s life who I will again, probably never see again? Because it meant something to me. It was another reminder that things don’t just happen by chance. We go through certain things in order to get us to the places we need to go.
If Pappy didn’t break his back at 24, he never would have become one of the best dart throwers in FL, never would have found his way to Long Island, NY to be a fisherman and in turn, meet his second wife, settle down in Louisville and become the head of maintenance for a nice hotel in Kentucky.
Pappy’s story matters. And yours does too. It may seem like your life is a zig zag, and nothing really makes sense, but the destination will be worth the trip. I know in my own life it’s been worth it. It’s been messy, crazy and unpredictable at times, but God knows what he’s doing. He doesn’t just let us flail around down here on earth for no reason.
My friend Liz said the book I write needs to be called “Seeing God in your 20’s,” and then when I’m 30, I’ll come out with the sequel “Seeing God in your 30’s.”
What do you think?
I think I’ll just start. That’s how all great stories begin, right?
I also am smiling as I write today because I’ve recently found out a lot about my grandma Elsa. She wrote a lot too. I was named after Elsa Marchink from Charleston, South Carolina. She passed away when I was around 8 or 9. I miss her.
I don’t remember her much, just that she was super thin, a chain smoker, constantly drinking black coffee and always took me and my sister to the movies. I also will never forget the time my sister and I were in the car waiting for her to pump gas when we heard her yell the “S” word for the first time under her breath. She had spilled gasoline on her white leather grandma shoes and didn’t think we had heard her. I can still remember giggling with my sister about it like it was yesterday.
She always had those mini boxes of cereal for us too, the variety pack, remember those? And we thought we were in heaven because growing up, frosted cheerios were thought of as “too sugary” in the Ketchum household, but at Grandma Elsa’s, we could be naughty.
**Side bar** One time, kid you not, mom made us pick out ALL of the mini marshmallows in the the ENTIRE box of Lucky Charms that dad brought home. He bought the cereal on clearance and didn’t see what the big deal was, but mom thought otherwise. “Why would you buy that for the girls, Larry!??!” Still traumatized.
In finding out that my Grandma Elsa wrote quite a bit, I figured it’s only appropriate that I follow in her footsteps and start writing more too.
I think a lot of my book someday will be random side stories anyway, because if you’ve ever had a conversation with me, you know that’s how I roll. I tell about seven different stories to get to the main story, which usually has a very terrible punch line. Still working on my stand-up routine. It’s not there yet. Good things take time, okay??
My purpose will be found as I write, I know it. I always think I have to have things “tied up in a pretty bow” in order to just start. Nope. I need to just start. How do you get anywhere anyway….you just START!
I have never felt ready for anything in my life. I think that’s how you know you’re an adult. You don’t feel ready, but you still have to make decisions and move forwards. You just feel the fear and do it anyway.
My writing might just be a creative outlet…a way to just get my words out there. Maybe nothing ever gets published and my words are only seen by a few people. Maybe I write a top seller. Either way, I know that my stories, the things I think about and how I see God in the most random things matter. I know there’s a reason for it all. I want to share it. Someone needs to hear it. So here’s to starting.
I hope these words bless someone out there today. God appoints every moment, even the ones we think are mundane. I challenge you to ask God to show you what you might be missing today. That person you’re supposed to have a conversation with and learn from, or the person you’re supposed to encourage. When it happens, you’ll know it’s an appointed time. It’ll be a kairos moment. I promise.
E Written: October 16, 2019
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