But it was expensive...
What if something comes up and I need it?
But my grandmother gave it to me...
What if that person who gifted me it finds out?
What if I lose the weight and it finally fits?
Cut the crap.
Drop the guilt.
GET RID OF IT NOW!
Donate it. Trash it. Someone else might want it. Give it to a friend.
I don't mean to be frank, but I'll be frank.
I LOVE organizing.
And by organizing, I mean, helping people get rid of things they don't need and don't love.
I love getting rid of stuff.
Heck, maybe it's a flaw.
But when you're about to move across the country and have to pack your life up into your car, you begin getting rid of stuff quickly.
And it feels good.
Do I miss some of the things I got rid of?
Maybe, if I even remember them.
Okay I totally miss that dresser I sold to a friend for a few hundred bucks that's actually worth THOUSANDS....but we won't talk about that.
But really, I wouldn't trade my life now to get back the things I've gotten rid of.
You realize you can live on a lot less and are actually a lot happier when you have less stuff.
It's almost as if you begin to see more clearly too.
You might even end up buying LESS because you're happy and content with what you have.
I never would admit it until now, but I think there have been times in my life when I was a bit of a shopaholic. GAP shopping sprees in college, anyone??
Now this didn't mean I was obsessed with designer brands or shopped everyday, I am a Ketchum. I love a deal. But I can think of a handful of seasons in my life where I shopped to ease my anxiety. I shopped because it gave me comfort. I shopped when I felt lonely. And just like I can turn to food for comfort, I can turn to stuff. And clothes.
And people.
And a new sweater really can make you happy (for the time being).
And texting that guy can really make you feel good (for the time being).
And a carton of ice cream can really be the best thing ever (for the time being).
And maybe the reason we have guilt in getting rid of things is because we never should have purchased them to start with.
Or talked to that guy.
Or eaten that package of cookies.
I am learning the value of my money and the value of what I put in my life.
And really, in life, literally an figuratively, you get what you pay for,
And you're probably overwhelmed because you have too much stuff.
Less stuff = more happiness.
At least this is what Marie Kondo and my friend Sara have taught me...
But none of that is the point of this post.
Yes this post is about getting rid of things.
But it's about getting rid of things that aren't tangible.
It's about getting rid of something that is way more detrimental to your life than having one too many T-shirts in your closet.
My post is about this:
GETTING RID OF THE TOXIC THOUGHTS IN YOUR MIND.
Like I said before, it's as easy as:
1) Cut the crap
2) Drop the guilt 3) DONATE IT NOW! Well, actually don't donate it, cover it in gasoline, light it on fire and throw it off the top floor of your building.
It's about time we get rid of our horrible internal dialogue.
You ever put something on and you're like "OMG I AM HUGE, UGLY, FAT, NO NO, AH!"
Same.
And then you put something else on -- that shirt you love or the pants that make your butt look good and you think -- "Who's that smoke show!!!?!?!?"
Our internal dialogue writes the script of who we think we are.
I just caught myself in the mirror getting ready.
This stuff takes work - you have to catch yourself.
And then you have to grab the thought, take it captive and DONATE IT!
(or light it on fire, either works)
Instead of, "oh my gosh another zit, ew my hair, I feel so huge in this, etc, etc, etc," I looked at myself and I said,
"Elsa.
Stop.
Zits make you human.
Your body is alive and breathing.
You aren't living with chronic pain.
You are strong.
You are beautiful.
And your body is amazing because the God of the Universe made it."
Yet what do we do? We ourselves down....all day long.
Those little comments add up.
And it becomes the script of our lives.
And I know I'm not the only one .
That's why I always post these Blogs.
I'm never the only one.
I have a wonderful friend who texted me the most beautiful message and I wanted to share it. I re-wrote it a bit because I KNOW someone else needs to hear this too.
And it's texts like this that remind me that I'm not who I see myself to be.
And you aren't either.
So here goes:
"I was praying for you this morning, that you would be gentle with yourself throughout this whole thing and every day.
Praying that you could see yourself through everyone else’s eyes and see how astoundingly beautiful you are on the inside and out.
That you would know that it’s okay to have off days or not be okay. It's okay to not have a good day.
That you won’t beat up on yourself if you are feeling huge on your period because it’s okay to literally just let go sometimes.
That you could know how adored you are by so many people and by me. And God, first and foremost.
That it’s okay to not be able to to feed into other people and that you can let God feed into you as well.
And if you need to, at any point, let out a well needed cry, do it.
Let out the hurt or pain or frustration if you feel that.
You need to know that you are so unbelievably full of love. You are full of hope and you encourage people and lift them up...BUT you must know that it’s okay to let go every now and again.
It’s okay to have feelings that you are totally confused by.
Everything is okay to feel and experience.
Don’t allow lies to cloud your thoughts that you aren’t enough.
You are so much more than enough in God's eyes.
Doesn't matter what others think or are going through.
You can let yourself free.
You can let yourself breathe."
So, maybe next time you put on that shirt and want to say all those horrible things to yourself, don't. Just don't.
Catch yourself.
And donate those thoughts.
I'll leave you with that.
Be encouraged.
Xx
Elsa
P.S. I've been really convicted about a lot of things the last few weeks. We are in a global pandemic. This is wild. No one is okay right now. So whatever you're experiencing in this, just remember you are covered in grace. You are not alone. Give yourself grace, give others grace -everyone is reacting and responding and life is just a LOT right now. So love well, take care of yourself, take care of others and make sure you're drinking enough water!
And how am I really doing in all of this "body wise?" Not great, I'll be honest. But I'm just trying to think about it less. I'm working on nitpicking less. I'm shifting my focus. I recently heard a sermon reminding me that repentance means turning- we need to turn, y'all. We need to turn our gaze off of ourselves and put it on the One who tells us who we are. I think the more we do that, the less we will turn to the things that we find "comfort" in. Whether that's chasing a perfect body, comfort food, more clothes, makeup/beauty products, a bad boy, a perfect home, whatever, you name it.
P. P. S. But really think about it for a second.... if you had "perfect skin" or "a perfect body" you'd probably be even more vain and obsessed with yourself than you already are, right? Think about that for a second. That's the case for me at least. Zits keep you humble. Zits remind me to give yourself grace. Zits remind me that I'm not in control. Zits remind me that I'm not perfect- or maybe I'm the only one thinking about this and I'm just a total weirdo. But I know someone out there is smiling right now because they get it. They're wishing some aspect would change about themselves too. Remember what I said, they make you human. You're beautiful. Weight fluctuations, imperfect skin, whatever. You're still beautiful. Because you know what makes you beautiful anyway? Your insides. Being kind. Being loving. Being a person who knows who she is and doesn't have to worry about it all day long and second guess it :)
Love it patient.
Love is kind.
It does not envy.
It does not boast.
It is not proud.
So be patient with yourself too.
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